Rape exists, in part, because society continues to support most myths which condone the act itself and place the blame and responsibility upon the victim. These attitudes can be seen in our literature, religions, laws, music, science, advertising, and daily conversation - all aspects of our culture. Listed below are some common myths/misconceptions, followed by a factual response...
Myth: Rape is an act of sexual gratification. The victim is irresistible to the rapist.
Fact: Rape is an act of violence, not of sexual desire. It is a life-threatening experience. Also, one important emotional payoff for the rapist is to be in control, not out of control. The primary motive displayed by most convicted rapist is aggression, dominance, and anger, NOT sex. Sex is used as a weapon to inflict violence, humiliation, and conquest on a victim. While sexual attraction may be influential, power, control and anger are the primary motives. Most rapists have access to a sexual partner. Gratification comes from gaining power and control and discharging anger. This gratification is only temporary, so the rapist seeks another victim.
Myth: Rape is not a serious problem in our country.
Fact: Rape is the fastest-growing and most under reported crime. Over "one-third" of all women in this country will be sexually assaulted or abused in their lifetime. Only about 1 in 10 rapes of adults is reported, and fewer assaults of children are reported.
Myth: Sexual assault is an impulsive, uncontrollable act of passion.
Fact: The majority of rapes are planned: the place arranged, enticement used, or the victim deliberately sought and coerced into sexual relations. It is the vulnerability of the victim that attracts the sexual predator. 90% of group rapes are planned. 58% of single rapes are planned. 75% of all rapes are planned. Practically every word of this myth can be converted by facts. Impulsive, controllable; as seen above, a majority of rapes are planned. Victims range from infants to the elderly. Anyone, regardless of age, sex, physical appearance, marital status, ethnic, religious or socio-economic background can be raped.
Myth: Good people don't get raped. Only bad people get raped.
Fact: Rapist and other sex offenders attack people of all races, ages, social backgrounds, and all moral persuasions. Yet many people believe in this myth. It serves as a defense mechanism for them. People feel safer if they believe that something that the victim did, or some way the victim lived, provoked the attack. Therefore, if they continue to live and act circumspectly, nothing bad will happen to them. This is, perhaps, one of the most dangerous myths anybody can believe. Most rapists choose their targets without regard to physical appearance or lifestyle. Victims are of every type, race, and socio-economic class, young and old alike. . If one believes that the victim was responsible because she put herself in an unsafe position, such as being out late at night, drinking alcohol, dressing in a certain way, or "leading on" the rapist, then we are able to feel safer because "we wouldn't do those things." But, the basic fact remains that without consent, no means no, no matter what the situation or circumstances.
Myth: Women provoke rape by the way they dress, "they ask for it."
Fact: No woman's dress or behavior gives someone the right to sexually assault her. According to the Federal Commission on Crimes of Violence, only 4% of the reported sexual assaults involved any participative behavior by the victim, and most of this consisted of nothing more than dressing or walking in a way that is socially defined as attractive. Even in a situation where a woman is flirtatious or clearly interested in sex, she is not asking for rape. Rape in an attack in which the victim's life is controlled by the attacker. No person asks for or deserves such an assault. A hitchhiker is asking for a ride, not a violent attack. Part of the problem also lies in the interpretation men put on women's behavior. When women are cheerful and friendly, which they have been taught to be, some men interpret this as a "come-on." Again, this myth forms a part of the "good woman's" defense against a sense of vulnerability.
Myth: Sexual assault is provoked by the victim. Victims ask for it by their actions or behaviors.
Fact: To say that someone wants to be raped is the same as saying that people ask to be mugged or robbed. In fact, most rapes are at least partially planned in advance and the victim is often threatened with death or bodily harm if he or she resists. Sexual assault is not a spontaneous crime of sexual passion. It is a violent attack on an individual using sex as a weapon. Sex is used to defile, degrade and destroy a victim’s will and control over his or her own body. For the victim, it is a humiliating, near death situation. No person would ask for or deserve such an attack.
Myth: Sexual assault occurs only in large cities.
Fact: Rapes have been reported all across the country -- in large cities and small towns. While more sexual assaults occur in large cities, this is due solely to a greater population. Victims who live in rural areas may not have the same anonymity in a small town and access to services that she would have in a larger community. Survivors of sexual violence in these communities may therefore be less likely to tell anyone, report it to the police or seek support.
Myth: Women are sexually assaulted when they are out alone at night. If women stay home they will be safe.
Fact: Studies show that the majority of sexual assaults are committed in either the victim’s home or the offender’s home.
Myth: Most rapists hide in dark alleys, waiting for a stranger to walk past.
Fact: The majority of reported rapes occur either in the victim’s home or the home of the attacker. In many cases, the victim met the offender in a public place and then was coerced into accompanying the rapist to the place of the assault. Most rape victims know their attacker at least casually. In many cases, offenders were well known to the victim and were in relationships that one would normally trust, i.e. boyfriend, family friend, close neighbor or relative.
Myth: Most rapists are poor.
Fact: Rape crosses all class lines. People have been raped by doctors, lawyers, police officers, and other authority figures. Because of their social and financial positions, these offenders are seldom prosecuted for the acts of violence, and their actions are seldom publicized.
Myth: No person can be sexually assaulted against his or her will.
Fact: Rape is a crime of violence, not sexual passion. In many cases, some type of force is used, such as choking, beating, roughness, or use of a weapon. Often, the victim is threatened with death if he or she resists. Confronted with the fear of being beaten or killed, many victims do not attempt to fight an attacker. While a victim may not resist an attack due to socialization and fear of violence, this lack of resistance should not be equated with consent for the attack. Many mugging victims hand over their wallets willingly to maintain their safety, but they did not ask to be mugged.
Myth: Most rapes are reported by women who “change their minds” afterwards or who want to “get even” with a man.
Fact: Statistics show that only 3% of rape calls are false reports. This is the same false-report rate that is usual for other kinds of felonies.
Myth: Women have rape fantasies and secretly desire rape. If you are going to be raped, you might as well relax and enjoy it.
Fact: When people have sexual fantasies of seduction, they choose the circumstances and characteristics of their seducer. They are in control. In rape, the victim is never in control. There is a big difference between fantasy and reality. Rape is neither relaxing nor enjoyable. Again, victims often submit without struggle due to fear of physical force, or because the assailant is armed with a deadly weapon. Victims’ responses to rape reflect the violence and intense trauma of the event. After being raped: 42% reported feeling afraid of men, 28% said it affected their sex lives, 27% felt less independent or more afraid of being on their own, 28% said it damaged their trust in male-female relationships, 18% felt worthless or lost self-respect, 17% felt hostile toward men, 10% sustained physical injuries, 7% reported suicidal impulses, 5% suffered nightmares.
Myth: Rapists are crazy, deranged, abnormal perverts. They are lonely men without female partnership.
Fact: Rape is not a crime of spontaneous passion. Studies show that 60 to 70% of all sexual assaults are planned. Most rapists are married and having consensual sexual relations while assaulting other women. A rapist can be anyone: doctor, policeman, clergyman, social worker or corporate president.
Myth: Men cannot be raped.
Fact: Sexual assault, no matter the gender of the perpetrator or victim, is a form of violence where sex is used to demean and humiliate another person. Current statistics indicate that one in six men are sexually assaulted or abused in their lifetime. Typically, the perpetrator is a heterosexual male. Sexual assault of males is thought to be greatly under-reported.
Myth: There is a "right way" to respond to a rape situation.
Fact: Since rape is life-threatening and each rapist has his own pattern, the best thing a victim can do is follow her instincts and observe any cues from the rapist. If the victim escapes alive she has done the right thing.
Myth: A victim should be discouraged from dwelling on the rape. She should "forget it".
Fact: This advice generally comes from people who are more concerned with their own feelings than the victim's. All victims should be offered the opportunity to talk about the assault with those personally close to them and knowledgeable professionals. Victims who are not allowed to talk about the rape have a much more difficult time recovering from it.
Myth: Incest is rare.
Fact: Incest is common and happens in every community. An estimated 77% of reported sexual abusers are parents (57% of the total being natural parents), 16% are other relatives, and 6% are non-related. In addition, males are reported to be the abusers in 60 to 95% of cases.
Myth: Sexual assaults are rare deviations and affect few people. After all, no one I know has been raped.
Fact: Sexual assaults are very common. Most likely, someone close to you has been profoundly affected by sexual assault. Not only are victims reluctant to discuss their assaults but many succeed in totally blocking the assault from conscious memory. However, the trauma remains and may come to the surface at another crisis or when the opportunity to discuss it with a sympathetic person arises.
Myth: You can tell a rapist by the way he looks.
Fact: Rapists are not physically identifiable. They may appear friendly, normal, and non-threatening. Many are young, married and have children. Rapist types and traits however can be categorized.
Myth: A man can't rape his wife.
Fact: The idea that a man can't rape his wife suggests that married women do not have the same right to safety as do unmarried women. Some women do experience some form of sexual abuse within their marriage. Myth: Rape is just unwanted sex and isn't really a violent crime.
Fact: Rape is a lot more than unwanted sex, it is a violent crime. Many rapists carry a weapon and threaten the victim with violence or death.Myth: Rape only occurs outside and at night. If people stay at home, then they will be safer.
Fact: Rape can and does occur anytime and anyplace. Many rapes occur during the day and in the victims' homes.
Myth: Rape only happens to young attractive women.
Fact: Rape can and does strike anyone at anytime. Age, social class, ethnic group and has no bearing on the person a rapist chooses to attack. Research data clearly proves that a way a woman dresses and / or acts does not influence the rapists choice of victims. His decision to rape is based on how easily he perceives his target can be intimidated. Rapists are looking for available and vulnerable targets.
Myth: Most rapists only rape one time.
Fact: Most rapists rape again, and again, and again - until caught.
Myth: If the assailant, victim, or both are drunk, the assailant cannot be charged with rape.
Fact: Forcing sex on someone who is too drunk to give consent is second degree rape. Rape is a crime. People who commit crimes while under the influence of alcohol or drugs are not considered free from guilt. Sexual assault survivors are never responsible for the attack, no matter what, no matter how much alcohol was consumed. Responsibility lies with the perpetrator; the survivor is never responsible for the assailant's behavior. Alcohol may increase the risk of sexual assault, and may make someone incapable of giving consent or protecting themselves, but it is not the cause of the assault.
Myth: Women who are drunk are willing to engage in any kind of sexual activity.
Fact: The fact that a woman has been drinking does not imply consent. Alcohol and drugs can only render a woman incapable of consent.
Myth: Rape is a minor crime affecting only a few women.
Fact: It is estimated that 1 in 8 women will be raped in her lifetime. Because of low reporting rates, it is not known how many adult men are assaulted. It is also estimated that 1 out of every 4 girls, and 1 out of every 8 boys are sexually assaulted in some way before they reach adulthood. Rape is the most frequently committed violent crime in this country.
Myth: Gang rape is rare.
Fact: In 43% of all reported cases, more than one assailant was involved.
Myth: It's not rape if the couple is dating.
Fact: Unwanted sexual activity in any relationship qualifies as sexual assault.
Fact: Unwanted sexual activity in any relationship qualifies as sexual assault.
Myth: Rapists have psychological problems.
Fact: Most assailants are males with no history of mental disorder.
Fact: Most assailants are males with no history of mental disorder.
Myth: If the victim didn't fight or try to run away, or there was no weapon or injuries sustained, rape did not occur.
Fact: Threats of violence are a weapon, and a woman may not resist vigorously for fear of injury or death.
Fact: Threats of violence are a weapon, and a woman may not resist vigorously for fear of injury or death.
Myth: Only certain kinds of people get raped. It cannot happen to me.
Fact: Rapists act without considering their victim's physical appearance, dress, age, race, gender, or social status. Assailants seek out victims who they perceive to be vulnerable, from infancy to ninety-two years of age and from all racial and socioeconomic backgrounds.
http://www.rwu.edu/campus-life/health-counseling/counseling-center/sexual-assault/rape-myths-and-facts
